Notebook

Verbatim

"You probably can't find anybody on Mars who trusts Bill Clinton, either."
--Dole campaign press secretary Nelson Warfield

"He's married to the head of the American Red Cross, so he can get fresh blood whenever he wants it."
--Comedian Harry Shearer on concerns about Bob Dole's health, on MSNBC

Winners & Losers

Love And Other Political Interests

[Winners]

Phyllis Macey
Dole's first wife finally tells her side of the divorce: she didn't want it; it was speeded up

Sarah ("fergie") Ferguson
The gay divorce proves she can be happy and civil in public with her ex -- beat that, Di!

Jackie Kennedy Onassis
She died in 1994, but bios of her still rivet us with accounts of her premarital sex life

[& Losers]

Arianna Huffington
Blasts smear ads, only to be reminded of her part in hubby's mudslinging 1994 Senate run

Hillary Clinton
Depositions from two close friends suggest her role in Travelgate was larger than she admits

Kitty Dukakis
Drug free but drowsy at the wheel, she crashes into a guardrail, injuring herself and Mike

Convention '96

An insider's look at what the delegates are up to during this week at the big Republican shindig in San Diego

The Goods on the G.O.P.

Each delegate gets his or her own "goody bag," assembled by the host committee. The bags include a number of special convention-edition products, ranging from macaroni and cheese with elephant- and star-shaped macaroni from Philip Morris to Hefty storage bags from Tenneco to a "roll back the beer tax" mug from Anheuser-Busch. Also included are raisins by Dole Food, baseball caps from Warner Bros. and msnbc, and a copy of the new book by g.o.p. chairman Haley Barbour--and all in a red-white-and-blue tote bag.

Pundits: Rather, Not

The Republicans are doing their best to make the convention must-see TV, but cable networks and multimedia outlets aren't depending on them. Some alternative political commentators on assignment:

Bill Maher And Chris Rock For Comedy Central
"We're not looking for scoops--we're looking for the best joke," says a Comedy Central publicist. Maher is doing a one-hour Politically Incorrect and anchors InDecision '96, while Rock is providing live reports from such places as Charlton Heston's party and the Mexican border.

Chuck D For Mtv
Tabitha Soren and crew anchor MTV's youth-oriented coverage, but rapper Chuck D from Public Enemy is a roving reporter for a day, talking to protesters outside and delegates inside. On Tuesday Art Alexakis from the heavy-metal band Everclear tapes a piece on Republican youth-outreach efforts.

Eleanor Mondale For E! News Daily
Since her father was once Vice President and once ran for President, Mondale may be more familiar with the process than many of the delegates. But she is focusing on Hollywood's obsession with politicians and celebrity endorsements, fund raising and activism.

Paula Poundstone For Mother Jones
Comedian Poundstone has covered conventions before. She's on site Tuesday but is also offering viewers a couch-potato perspective for Mother Jones' Website. She has already made several predictions, including this one: "The platform will contain an unusually large section on yachters' rights."

20 Years Ago In Time

Mr. Excitement

"Ford's selection of Kansas Senator Robert Dole as his running mate also appeased the conservatives...Some suspected that the Reaganites had all but forced the President to choose Dole--or someone else from the right. Actually, Ford had his own reasons for picking the Kansan. [Said] U.N. Ambassador William Scranton: 'He is an excellent campaigner of the type we need. The President is not the attacker type, but Bob can do that kind of campaigning.'...Cracks Minnesota Republican Chairman Chuck Slocum: 'We've got righteous Jimmy [Carter], dull Walter [Mondale] and stuffy Jerry. Bob Dole will add some zip to the campaign and prevent it from being dull.'"
--Aug. 30, 1976